6 Little Running Feet

      I became an instant foster mom of three almost a year ago. My hubby and I went into this journey with our eyes open knowing the children might be reunited with their parent. It's been almost a year and the children though challenged have bonded with us beyond our dreams. We love them and they love us. They constantly say they don't want to leave. Any little change of pace undoes them in ways that normal children aren't undone. At different times during normal daily activities such as having dinner different stories have come out about abuse and their past. It's so hard to process for yourself as a parent and even harder to help them. 
    There are things you hope for when you think you are going to be a parent. There are things you tell people that you will do and things you will "never" do but when you are in the thick of it all bets are off. 
   The details of our situation make me daily need to choose a different hope and alternative. I remember always feeling like education was important as a kid and how failing at it was just not an option. I suppose I felt that education would be the same for my kids, but right now it isn' t the end all beat all. I've had my perspective challenged because emotional health is taking precedence. Also always knowing that we would adopt I had assumed the children would not really look like us. I had pondered the many struggles that were sure to come with that and how others might react but never once did I think that they would look like me. Now I have the reverse problem were those who don't know our family assume they are biologically ours and all their quirks are my raising. It's amazing how in public you want to put your best foot forward and even more so as a mom. Some think automatically I am super mom because we were willing to chose to bring three small children into ours lives. I have never felt more challenged in my life. 
   No one really tells you that in parenting your past issues will all come flooding in and that you have to process that, maybe heal from or rethink in the midst of dealing with the here and in your face. I am neither a saint or hedonist but wow have I found out about myself in this process of completely rearranging my life. When you are out in everyday life and surrounded by other adults you tend to think of your home as your safe place when it's just you and your spouse. You can regroup there and figure out how to handle situations and destress and face the world again. When your life is changed to meet the every real and impressing demand of children you come to the end of yourself pretty quickly. I have no shame in saying that because it's the truth. I'm not more patient than the next mom or feel like fostering is something I can completely handle. Sure I think if the Lord sees fit to put these children back with their bio-dad that my heart would surely mourn for a long time. You have dreams about what your family will be like when everyone else is having baby after baby.
    But one thing that I have held strong to is that God really does see all! God knows all. I continue to believe and pray to no end that His plans for these children will come to fruition and I speak destiny into them every moment possible. I rise at 5 am everyday to go to my meeting place with  Abba Father to get my daily bread. The word says He hears me, that in my weakness He is strong and that He works in me to do His good pleasure. Without God this whole experience would come crashing down.  I am glad that God led us to this place where we chose to open our doors to show these children what a normal mommy and daddy do for each other and for their kids.

Announced on your chest at thrift stores

 

 1.) When donating items remember if you thought it was tacky then don't donate the tackiness. (Obviously someone was preoccupied by this issue and wanted the world to know about it)

 

2) In case you thought tacky t-shirts were only in English you might be surprised to know it's internationally spread. This shirt reads beautiful. Good to know you have to announce it on your chest.






 3) A very goofy kid's Romanesc costume. This thing was odd! While one and two were obvious chest tragedies this costume implores the whole body.



Again I feel I have to stress the point that if it was weird enough for you to have to get rid of why try to pass it to a thrift store????

Big Faith Little Strength

This morning I was reading Jeremiah chapter one and something struck me. Jeremiah responsed with words of fear to the all mighty's words of  how he knew him being formed in his mother's womb  and how there was a plan for him. Jeremiah  answered  " I don't know anything I am only a boy." Oh how many times have I felt small in my current challenge. I  have felt weak in the midst of chaotic moments and God's whisper let alone his plan seems a distant fading memory. But there have been moments where I find the streams of refreshing in moments where the Lord sweeps down and whispers " I have a plan, I knew you before you were born." Purposefully he chooses the weak to confound the wise. He fights the battle and we have the choice to walk it out.
 In the story of Willow, he's the smallest not just in obvious stature but in his own thoughts equally uncertain. The day comes for what he was called for and the battle before him is larger than he knows what to do with. He encounters one who can yield the sword and fight where he can't, how much more with God who fights for us! I am so thankful He knows my frame and sends help.

Here and Now List

There are things that sometimes make the here and now a little easier until we go meet our our Maker. Today I have decided these things would be lovely if they were possible.
1.)Doughnuts: Particularly a chocolate cake one but in a pinch two crullers will do.

2.) A Starbuck's mocha: The smoothness in a well made cup sends me to a happy happy place.







3.) A full body hour and half deep tissue massage.

4.)Yard Saling: When you are on the hunt of lovely cheap and sometimes free treasures there is this incredible release of stress, of things looming as suddenly you are overcome with thoughts of how can I use this? Well of course I need to move my space around. Well this will look fantastic with a coat of fresh spray paint in a rad color.






Now #1 and #2 together would be simply amazing. I think there is nothing wrong with hot coffee on a hot day and the more sweltering the better as that is what my upbringing has shown me. :O)


Please feel free to add to the list.

El Cheapo Pillows

 Many times I go into places like World Market and drool over fabulous pillows; but seriously who wants to pay $24 a pop or even $12 when it's on sale?! Definitely not me. So I bought two cloth napkins that were approximately $3 or so together and recovered old pillows. I have a fabric stash, as every good crafty/artistic person should have and went to work. I found fabric that is lovely in it's own right and matched one of the colors in the print.

Back of the pillow

I had this lovely silk that has been collecting dust in the closet and was finally able to pull it out. Hooray.
Now the front is absolutely lovely and I hope to bring in different pillows to play off the colors.
Now the colors are a bit brighter than they appear however with my limited time of blogging today you get the point. :O)

So for $3 dollars I got two lovely pillows.

Where the path goes I will follow

  Waiting on God's timing, plan and truly believing that when we make the plans God Himself directs your steps is quite the challenge. I think living in the bible belt so much of the Christian walk can be summed up on a cute cross stitched pillow or firey bumper sticker. Living here you can never be to far from a screaming preacher at a commonly congested intersection, but to dig deep in the inner well is a completely solitary matter all together.
    As a person who has wanted to be a parent for so long, the path we have traveled to get children in our home was something we never ever imagined. We made the decision to start the steps to becoming adoptive parents last January. We began our parenting class last April and this past October we encountered 3 children who were in need of a foster home. Again I will say I never saw this in our plans, I never purposed for this or made the plans for it. Yet the choice was there to turn one direction and ignore the need before us in the face of our own wants and desires or have our steps directed in a path that we did not plan for. Though our steps were made before us Father God gave us the choice to take them. I think that's what makes this Christian walk an adventure.
The father doesn't throw us to the wolves and say live or die.

He lays those steps before us and we make the choice to walk step to step. This walk has all matter of ways to configure how one step gets to another; just look in the Christian living section of a bookstore or at the many a sermons of different denominational varieties. Some have a 1, 2, 3 method and it all sounds so fool proof but oh how we forget our sheepish nature. On sheep 101 the instinct sheep have to follow is interesting

"sheep have a strong instinct to follow the sheep in front of them. When one sheep decides to go somewhere, the rest of the flock usually follows, even if it is not a good "decision." For example, sheep will follow each other to slaughter. If one sheep jumps over a cliff, the others are likely to follow. Even from birth, lambs are conditioned to follow the older members of the flock. This instinct is "hard-wired" into sheep. It's not something they "think" about."

When I think about the constant barrage on television, radio, billboards and magazines about what it takes to have a successful life it's like sheep following each other to the slaughter. Commercials never say o.k. stop and think about this, selah. If we just stop long enough to see just that one step that directs us we will find the adventure that is faith. Taking the time to listen and pause is the antithesis of our fast paced task orientated Western culture. Even in Christian service we can miss those moments to pause; you can miss the step provided because service can consume the quietness. Jesus said if you choose to "lose your life for him you will find it" meaning if you chose to serve him, if you chose those moments to take those steps that aren't what you have planned you will find the which will keep your well full.

I salute my pastor and his wife for taking time to unplug literally and find that next step that leads to the next dance. May your next dance be the dance of life and freedom.

A glue gun and a will!!!

I needed  decorative boxes to put art supplies out of the reach of tiny hands. I had been looking around pricing and surely the cheapest I could get was around $5 for the size I was looking for; I needed at least four. Now the $5 dollars were cheapo collapsible fabric boxes. I'm on a pretty tight budget as a stay at home mom and so I got an idea. Our youngest is in diapers and those diaper boxes are perfect for the size I need. 
and wala cool storage boxes.
Needed:

84 count diaper boxes I prefer People's choice diaper.
glue gun
several glue sticks
fabric enough to cover box
fabric scissors
regular sharp scissors
ribbon for trim (optional)


Instructions:
1.) Cut the flaps from the top of the box


2.) Spread out the fabric and place the box in the middle. Pull fabric around the box and cut according to the shape of the box making sure to leave flaps for overlap.


3.) Begin gluing the bottom of the box. Then proceed from the widest sides first. Then glue the ends.


4.) On the ends you will need to trim fabric a little to overlap fabric.


5.) I chose to add trim to make it more finished and fun.